August 1, 2006
Well, it’s been so long since I posted anything, I figured that I ought to post SOMETHING before people give up on checking this blogsite altogether.:^) I guess one reason I haven’t posted is that I haven’t had time. And I tend to wait until I have something really on my heart- something complete and well thought out; something I deem as worthy to be read. I guess I’ve had too many things on my heart to really narrow it down, sit down and write about it. I tend to like to categorize things, and when I can’t put my thoughts in a box, label them, and clearly say, “this is what it is”, I tend to keep them to myself. Perhaps that’s unwise. But as Popeye says, “I yam what I yam” (wasn't that Popeye?). But my Father won't let me stay like Popeye -as "I yam"- Praise the Lord!
So if there is something to share, this is it- God is purifying me! And wow am I seeing lots of dross! Too much it seems sometimes. At times I want to say, “Stop! That’s enough! Don’t show me anything else!” But thankfully, HE knows when to stop! Praise Him for that! As Pastor has preached on the walls coming down, I’ve definitely seen some walls coming down in my life. Okay, maybe not all of the way down… I’m not sure the state of the walls… but I DO know that some mighty big cracks are showing. You’d think that would make for an exciting, joy-filled time, wouldn’t you? Ha! As walls come down, they EXPOSE what’s behind them! When Jericho’s walls came down, the Israelites didn’t just throw a party because the walls were down and then that was it. They had to go in and continue the conquest of Jericho. They had to put to death the inhabitants of the city. The Lord showed me this after Pastor’s sermon. But I wondered how to fight, and Pastor shared the answer the next Sunday- We don’t battle with natural weapons, we put those things to death through the cross--through dying. So if I MUST put it in a box and label it, that’s where I’ve been. The walls ARE coming down (hallelujah), but I’m seeing ugly things behind those walls. Things in me that need to die! And they’re not dying easily… Some of them are fighting to live on! But I am determined! I will not go round this mountain again. I will not jump off this altar again. Jumping off may give me a temporary reprieve, but rest assured- I'll be back at this same place one day again if I do not remain and let God finish what He's begun.
I believe there is an anointing, RIGHT NOW, for breakthrough- to deal with deep-seated strongholds we’ve dealt with for years. Strongholds we’ve become so familiar and comfortable with that we’ve ceased to even fight them. Yes, we hate them, but it’s easier to live with them in the land than to fight them and put them to death. I’m reminded of so many of Israel’s kings who may have been good and who destroyed the idols of the land, but who left the high places… or left some of the inhabitants in the land and didn’t deal with them. And those inhabitants are still a thorn in Israel’s side to this day. The descendants of the children of Israel are today, battling those same enemies who were not dealt with back then. If I continue to leave the high places in my heart and life, if I continue to leave certain strongholds and open doors to the enemy- am I not hurting more than just myself? Am I also leaving that door open to my children? My grandchildren? My great-grandchildren? This go-'round, I feel a determination in my heart that I’ve never felt before when I’ve faced familiar strongholds once again- This time I will not stop fighting and dying until the walls are down and Jericho is conquered. This is the last time I will face this. Because I am going to not only face it, but conquer it in Jesus name! If I won’t do it for me, then I’ll do it for my children; for my generations. As I said before- there is an anointing for breakthrough right now! And it’s not just for me. It’s for everyone. Perazim- breakthrough! Yet we have a choice. Will we respond to Him in this season? Or will we jump and run before He’s done? Lord, help us to remain in the flame! (That sounds like a song! :^). Well- I guess I did have something to share after all. (Let me get out my marker and label this box! :^) If I've seemed not myself lately, just know, I am in the fire. It hurts and it isn’t fun. But I have hope in my heart that after the breakthrough, there will be more of Him! What more could I ask!? HE’s gonna be worth it all!
If I still have your attention- please keep our CD project in your prayers. For those who don’t know, our church, Hosanna First Assembly, is making our first worship CD, produced by Kent Henry. Please keep Eileen our Pastor’s wife and head worship leader in prayer as she organizes, plans, and deals with all of the many details of making a CD (much more details than I ever imagined) and as she deals with us (sometimes more trouble than the all of the details :^). Pray for wisdom and peace for her. Pray for each of our worship team members as God deals with our hearts. We’re all getting the purifying treatment :^). Pray for our unity. For out of unity, flows the anointing- YES! And please pray for joy and peace in the process!
Thanks so much and God bless. I'll try to not wait so long to blog again! KHJ
"Purify our hearts
Cleanse us from our sin
Open up the doors
And let the King of Glory in"